Big Brown Pimpsta’s Anti-Blog

Colin Anton is quite a trophy here on my blog… or anti-blog.  Actually, he is quite a trophy any way you look at him.  Tamil, hockey lover (more specifically a Maple Leafs fan), massive house with a Chandelier in his bedroom for no reason and as I said before, greatest thing since sliced bread due to being a Tamil and having a name under 10 letters.  He calls me every month to check up on me, such a good friend he is!  He also wants us to live as we did in Grade 11; play hockey then go to my boys house for Halo Multiplayer nights.   Innocent brown man, but he is a HORNY fucking brown man.

So I switch to a different subject for a few seconds here…

I pretty much hate anything to do with trying to show yourself off, advertising yourself and advertising your thoughts and feelings.  God, if your thoughts were physical things I would take my cock out and piss on them freely in front of the public.  Some are just so fucking sappy.  This shit is for your entertainment, I don’t put pictures of myself trying to look like a Wankster and write abstract faggot thoughts.  These networking sites can be interesting, but it’s sad when you get caught up into it.  Facebook is now an addiction according to some; you people should swim in my shit.  Friendster is nothing but the new Asianavenue; due to this I will not tag your fucking g-bookies on AsianAvenue!  But the biggest networking site whore of them all:  MySpace.  Who the fuck BUT me is on MySpace? I thank the many Hindu deities I have for that.  It has many celebrities on it, and its actually useful to get a band to gain rep.  But its PACKED with fucking emo’s and whores (literally, whores).  Come on, it doesn’t get your juices going when them dimes put up pics from their Saturday nights?  It works for me.  But even though they are hot dumb blondes, just cannot design a proper fucking page, sometimes the background is tiled with their fake bleached hair.  Or the page is just poorly formatted and you just wonder WHY you are even allowed to use the Internet.  But these are not issues for one tamil man: Colin Anton.

Colin has told me he fears of viewing pornographic material on his computer, thus has led to not viewing pornography all together (I think).  Something has to get you going when your going to choke the chicken, wank the willy, beat it off or for women, rub the lamp.  Something EROTIC to get you going.  After much rigorous testing, I have come to the conclusion that he masturbates to MySpace profiles.  Why?  Colin doesn’t come get drunk with us, we beg him to, but he refuses to.  He doesn’t attempt to harrass women like many of us do, but he secretly sits in his room, behind his laptop (he purchased recently) and adds girls he doesn’t even know.  I know you don’t know 2/3’s the women there Colin; but your jerking it off to all thirds them there (except your relatives….. I hope).

Here is a pic of his friends list.

I know your not THAT THAT COOL Colin!  He has 613 friends?  My friend Ariana is pretty popular, but she definitely doesn’t have that many buddies.  So my friend, please go download some porn rather than masturbating to pictures of your hot friends and unknown girls that don’t show you a titty on their profile.

Support him at http://www.myspace.com/colin89tml  !

Oh and MySpace can go to hell along with Rupert Murdoch.

Ahhhhh motherfuckers it’s been a long time….

In case you didn’t know, I have also added my blog to Facebook so it links here.  My opinions will be going to a broader audience.  I didn’t do a 1 yr anniversery post, but many fuckers believed I would do this shit for a few weeks.  EAT MY SHIT MOTHER FUCKER is what I have to say to you.  But do comment on all my posts.  Well before I talk I enjoy giving small updates of what I have done in the past few weeks I haven’t posted.  I beat fucking Ryerson; FYI they were trying to suspend me over a measely 3%.  Argued those cunts and I WON.  I celebrated by buying a shirt that states "Harmless Brown Man", which I think is pretty dead on.  Daniel Gerard is going dry until new years he claims, its quite a landmark event.  I nearly got into a fight with some Jamaican nigger at Eaton’s Centre this past week as he was hassling me and this dude with a hot girlfriend.  So that’s all that has been key I guess… oh and my birthday passed in August but that doesn’t fucking matter anyways to my post which won’t be too nutty today.

First of all, I would like to introduce Rozaan Nilar.  I’m sure many of you know of him; he may be a future child molester in disguise.  I have known him since grade 7, somehow.  I don’t know why he is single…. I mean who wouldn’t love a man who stays up till 6 AM reading about American politics on Wikipedia (which is attempting to ruin my own life) and then go to class at 9 AM.  Then he comes home at about 12 PM and messages me about how he groomed himself or wishes to clean out his ears.  Then researches THESE TOPICS it on Wikipedia once again.  That indeed is a catch ladies, don’t miss up on that Tamil!  But Roach as we call him is a also a harmless brown man for the most part, but when we are fucking hammered he can be a cock.  He enjoys putting you in headlocks, or more pleasurable to him is drawing on you.  I won’t say what he attempted on me or was a part of, because you’d just think I’m a fucking alchoholic (which I am not).  His recent prank was to draw on Daniel Gerard while he slept peacefully after the cottage… he wrote clearly "Sex Me Up".  His parents being good ol whitefolk and all didn’t say anything to poor old Dan when he walked in with that shit on his face.  But Danny G and I demanded revenge.  It wasn’t that bad what he did to us, but his constant talking about business and school made us want to piss and shit on him somehow.  So we decided "hey this motherfucker CLAIMS he is educated! I guess we should do this (pics were insanely high res on Windows Vista, so you might need to zoom in):

He pussied out and asked us to remove it… so we did.  Reason being the whole tamil community would see it and heat would go on him.   I was considering putting his real phone # so he really got proposals.  Would be fucking awesome!  I love bharatmatrimony.com.  Anyways, the moral of the story: Roach don’t draw on our faces and attempt to shave off what is required to stay on us, or put us in headlocks while we are crunked up.  Thanks!

Now, we all hate school to some degree.  Some more than others, I don’t think I hate school enough though.  I have given it too many chances only not to end up like so many lifes great examples (no names are mentioned).  Love it or hate it, to be something in this world you gotta do it (if you are brown, you gotta be a doctor, lawyer, engineer, businessman or accountant to be something).  But Ryerson ITM is really starting to show its colors right now.  Like I mentioned earlier, I fought them for a measely 3%.  They were fucking JEWING ME.  Now you also start to realize what Information Technology Management is as well: its run by a bunch of rejected Engineers who are taught to tell you Engineering is trying to chew them up and spit you out (Engineering students: they state this in our lecture!).  In reality, IT IS THEM THAT IS FUCKING DOING IT TO OUR PROGRAM.  You tell me, how can I be in a learning seminar which is NOT grouped by major but EVERYONE in there that is on probation is in ITM?  Stupid kids?? Not exactly.  This department also has amazing staff members such as Marge in the office, who motivate students (****sarcasm alert whores****).  Now obviously I have quite a few buddies in ITM, but face it guys…. what the fuck is up with the people in it?  It’s all refs or fobs that come to class, watch hindi movies and anime on their laptops.   Then they run back to Mississauga, Markham and Scarb to go smoke a nice fat blunt with their crews.  No one motivates anyone in there; to find action in there is as common as finding a reffed out brown person willing to pay for good service.  That comes around often, doesn’t it huh?  So if you fall in to this category, god stop being so fucking ignorant and open up for once you wankers.  Get out of those fucking thinkpads, trying to run CS Source and WoW at maximum performance and socialize for once.  Maybe then we won’t have such a fucking depressing department where everyone is FAILING.

On other notes

- Patryk outran a nigger within the Eaton’s Centre at 5:15 AM up an escalator so he could order a Nintendo Wii.  Good job!

- I can’t get this video or song out of my head, so I think you should ALL watch it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ll8Qm8yDj-8

Everyone has been asking me when will I post?  Some see me as their god now, its quite a compliment from the large amount of Asian atheist kids who are too lazy to go to temple.  Well where the fuck have I been?  Niggas, do I have some stories for you….

The World Cup finished if I recall when I made my last post, all the WOPs are worn out from all the partying and have decided to run back in Wopbridge, ONT to live their snobby lifestyles.  In addition, during that time I think everyone was "Ridin’ Dirty" because they were amazed by Chamillionaires’s cheesy ability to singalong and double his voice (thank god the song is dieing out).  June and July had been slow months, August a bitch, even if anything interesting did happen I wouldn’t waste my time sharing because this isn’t time for me to express my FEELINGS of sadness, happiness and goals in my life.  No one gives a ratsass what is going on with you and your boyfriend/girlfriend, situation at home, where your going to be in 10 years and why you realize your such a fucking huge cunt on this planet.  That is why I am here to bitch about the most random issues and tell you stories about how the world is for the people that don’t open a newspaper or do any research in this lifetime.  Sorry today will not be a learning sessions for you losers, more time for me to bitch today.  Although as a quick summary I have been drinking, living in rage and installed Windows Vista, so nothing new guys.  Sorry I don’t get paid to do this shit, so if I feel lazy to post, suck it up and have a beer won’t you?

Right now I am waging war on Ryerson University.  Why do you ask?  They are fucking cocksuckers that are trying to dick me around for 3%.  It has gone to the point of fucking appeals.  A work conference is to be the blame for this (which I will rant about later).  But I’m no bitch to express my stress and "feelings" on this issue.  If I was, I’d really hope you stop reading my blog.  But I love how stupid administration.  You come in a respectful, your loved by them as much as bouncers love Paris Hilton (earlier this week she got bounced from a club, fucking sket!).  For anyone that is in Ryerson ITM,  watch out for Marge.  You look at her and wonder why Ryerson allows dirty cunts like her to be hired.  I came in with a letter and got no fucking respect from this bitch.  Until I gave a few more explanations, then she was "sympathetic".  I told her I’m riding on my luck to get my appeal through, her reply is I guess you are.  That’s quite encouraging bitch; how many people did you say that to have your salary paid.  It takes about 10 students to waste their tuition on you, your not worth 10 dollars of a quick fuck.  I came in a second time, in a more defensive and composed approach.  I actually requested not to see her but it didn’t happen, the guy at the front who worked there even agreed with me hahaha!  But this time I saw her she wasn’t as big of a bitch, but definitely she was shut down when she was trying to imply anything to me.  In addition, I have gone through admin before in high school multiple times and been fucked over through blantant LIES.  Overpaid fucks in GENERAL, but not all of them.  For 3% I’m being hassled like Rodney King, I will not explain why I’m in this situation (no I didn’t fail the class). I just loved how they don’t stop mailing brochures before you get in: "come into fucking Frosh! Memories of a lifetime!" "come into the pub!" "come into the activities!", but when its your marks on the line they leave you stranded and nothing to do but surrender like the French.  Send me money to fight this war through paypal people if you can, I don’t need funding for it but a scam is always good to run!  I will update you on the situation.

ITM in general is full of fucking geeks; not as bad as Comp Sci but it is quite annoying nonetheless.  No kids, the prof does not care if you can run CS Source on your laptop.  Nor does your classmates care you have coded in every fucking language and if C+ is your native tongue now.  Geeks can never leave me, I am forced sometimes to meld in with them.  But working for a tech store can be quite annoying as you get customers and some coworkers (most of you guys are cool) that want to pull you in to this cesspool.  As I mentioned a work conference has put me in a fucked position in school, it was in late July.  I guess it was bad timing, but it was more what happened at this conference which makes me regret attending.  We had one paki trying to pick up my friend, he never stops.  You look at him and think: "why aren’t you at Futureshop my comission whore of a friend?".  No names will be mentioned.  Then we had one guy, named Steve.  HOLY FUCK.  I don’t know what the Compusmart was thinking (I work for them unfortunately), but this guy will seriously scare away customers.  Slap a Swastika on his head and you would of had serial killer CHARLES MANSON (younger version).  Go research Manson online if you don’t know who he is (or watch that episode on South Park, same shit).  Guy was fucking annoying as shit, I bet my boy Patryk (aka Project Pat) wished he really was on Manson’s hitlist.  Then we had geeks ranging from the ages of 17-22, and I swear, who busted out their laptops to watch MIGHTY MORPHIN POWER RANGERS and Transformers (with the latter being fairly acceptable).  They got their lunches, went into the corner and were watching as if they were really in it.  I don’t want to know why they were watching it, possibly to get hard off Kimberly the pink ranger or simply practicing for the real monster attacks.  You never know what the fuck might happen these days, and watching them Power Ranger episodes might do you good huh?  If I made fun of them, this is all they would have to say illustrated by this picture:

After this, I required a vacation.  So I went on a vacation for the first time in six years and came back two days later.  What a fucking long time that was!  Me and my boys hit Matt Kieffer’s cottage (which is like his palace up north, a must see I must admit).  This resulted in me getting in touch with my inner honkie self.  My buddies got pretty fucking blazed out their minds, tried to get me to open up and smoke up as well, and failed miserably.  I was labelled the IRRITATOR by Leo because I simply pointed out how nicely baked he was.  If you guys know, I am the cigar smoker, not pot.  Nothing against it, I’m just cooler than you kids that way.  I was for once fed properly due to Kieffer’s legendary culinary skills; but they pale in comparison with my moms burnt offerings she always gives me for dinner *sarcasm retards*.  I also got nicely done in with no hangover again off some good whiskey and vodka.  But the air, it made me feel as if I was a true CANADIAN!  Working a white colllar job, 9-5pm, vacations when I want, have a golden retriever, breakfest at 8, lunch at 12, dinner at 6 and drive a Ford Taurus.  It was the cottage country air that made me feel this way.  In addition, Roach and I was a sight to see.  It was like all the white folk were like "WOW! Colored people! Here! Brown? I’ve heard of them!".  I think we caught more attention than a family of ducks swimming nearby. 

But don’t worry people I have not forgotten where I come to rant and bitch and inform you of the world.  The one year anniversy of this anti-blog is coming up, maybe I should make it the one year anniversey and repeat the events of what inspired me to do it.  Drink a mickey and a half of vodka within 1/2 hr and 2 pints of beer, go around town trashed in your boxers, get rejected from every club, end up in your car passed out, get up the next morning at your buddy’s place with no hangover or recollection of the night before, and then realize you have lost your wallet when it’s actually in the dirty Brit’s Luke Gerards’s jacket after cancelling your cards.  Give me ideas and issues I can critique for this one year anniversery, much appreciated.

Well the World Cup finished on Sunday, not that it matter to Cakers.  They are just waiting October to roll around (not that I’m not not) and hockey begins (fuck yes!).  But for them its not a matter of pride, or life and death if their team wins or loses (unlike Italians and Koreans), its more of a matter like this for Cakers:

"Heeyy Joe, we pickin up a 2-4 for the wekend eh  The Leafs game’s on and puck drops at 7 eh?" 

"Why not? We can’t take the boat up the cottage anymore ehh… and the kids can’t go water skiing eh."

Quite a significant issue we have here…NOT.  As much as the WOP’s (without a passport aka ITALIANS) piss us off, they do celebrate when they win.  Even if the win was dirty, as many say.  Unfortunately the Portugease didn’t win… damn I was offered many free services such as carpentry and home cleaning, if they won.  They also promised to add obnoxious ginos as the people that would serve me.   Now cleaning peoples homes, that must be the way to celebrate!  Zidane also ended his career off on a low note.  For the fools that refuse to listen to news (or about the World Cup such, as Cakers),   the Captain of the Frogs headbutted Italy’s Materazzi or however you spell the fucker’s name very late in the game, thus resulting in Red Card.  At the moment of this post, Zidane doesn’t really want to tell the world what really was said to him.  Speculation is on Materazzi said many things about his family and him being a terrorist; but I really don’t think words can weaken an athelete.  It is more along the lines of greed.  You know why? There was a special high def camera that caught exactly what happened and I have proof mufuckas!

Why Zidane did it! Shocking! Click Here!

So the truth is: Don’t lay a finger on Zidane’s Butterfinger!  Only I can dig for the truth so deep because I am the god of blog posters.  I have nothing else to between talking to my boy Roach and pornography, so I put my time to good use by researching significant info.

Speaking of significant, rap is significant in my life.  Fuck, people complain I listen to too much of it.  Theres never too much rap music, just too many trashy rockers that love their drugs.  My artists supply you niggas with drugs and the white suburb kids with entertainment (and drugs).  One example is Young Jeezy aka the Snowman.  Its quite funny how the world works: white man gets high off black man supply, but in return makes fun of black man.   It’s also funny that they allow idiot rappers such as Young Jeezy become a millionaire off his music instead of his drugs.  Holy fuck I don’t know where to start with this fool, this faggot pisses the shit out of from any open hole on my body.  Last summer, this "nigga" was simply put out thanks to Mannie Fresh’s beat for "And then what".  Good party beat and then Akon probably put him up a bit more with Soul Survivor. Then I started realizing hmm…. this guy is pretty fucking annoying.  I thought maybe he will be a little different, album was boring as shit then came My Hood.  Annoying little song.  He isn’t Lil’ Jon annoying, because we all know that we love the hate his constant "WHAT?" and "OKAYYYYYYY!" and its not the same without him.  But Jeezy wouldn’t stop EY!, CHYEAHHHHH, ALRITEEEEEE! and still hasn’t to this date.  This consistently aggravates me.  His songs make no fucking sense except we are notified how he is the fucking Snowman 20 times over due to his illegal drug dealing past (wow thats new for a rapper ain’t it!).  I’ll piss on you Snowman and gladly turn you yellow.  Then he has the stupidest fucking grin I’ve seen on ANYONE.  Click on the thumbnail below:

He has that grin in every fucking video, check the video for Bun B - Get Throwed, you might as well go and throw your tv out the window instead if it brings you any peace after seeing his stupid grin non-stop.  "I GRINDDDDDDD HARD, CHYEAH!".  Then to top it all off, I’d do Christina Millian any time.  I’d dump many many women for her.  Jeezy claims "I hate being commercial man! None of that, I’ma be street!". Wow your street and trill by doing a song with a fucking POP STAR (recall "Say I" anyone?).  No, that really doesn’t make you commercial! (****SARCASM ALERT****).  God suck it up Jeezy, realize you are a pop star with little or no lyrical ability.  Let god piss on you Snowman, then you will fade away with MC Hammer and the rest soon hopefully.  CHYEAH!

Now for the last part, pedophiles are a pretty touchy subject.  Even I don’t dare joke with it.  Rather I spit on them.  But this dude Maddox who runs www.thebestpageintheuniverse.com (which I will not debate the name) has made Pedophiles hillarious through a a little bit of trivia.  I gurantee you will have fun, or don’t come back my anti-blog… okok you know if you don’t come you won’t know anything about the real world.

Have fun:

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=spot_the_pedo

To the retards who are members on Friendster, you guys are going nowhere in life because you didn’t comment on my posts. Then the rest who don’t want to read it because you would be shocked with real world info, fuck you bitches. Burn and die niggas. The rest that read it, praise it and now admit I am a god among writers, you be my true homeys now. Ahh all the rest are fucking cunts, dirty cunts. I will admit, I outdid myself on the last post. I was pretty fucking dead on every point people told me. It’s the truth about Tamils; I don’t think I could say it any better. Some were in tears it was so hilariously accurate. In addition, to the people that think I run some kind of brown mafia: it’s a possibility. Do remember I am an original creation. There are no brown peeps like me who can make everyone look stupid at once. I could create the first Indian mafia (no not a wankster pussy clique or "gang") here in the Dirty Dot. So maybe I might be run some type of uber-cool brown Mafia! Recently, I was advised by someone to post about her and her girlfriends, and how they are "cool". Fuck woman, all I gotta say about you girls, naughty or nice, in a large group it’s too easy to insult you guys if you ask me. To do that, it’s as easy as tipping a gimp out of his/her wheelchair. Fuck, even if I liked or hated you girls its way toooooooo fucking easy to hit below the belt (not literally, it doesnt work on females duh). You are just asking to be grilled too easily; I’d rather use my brains and make fun of people meaningful. In other news, after so many months I finally named my blog. If you notice, it’s no longer simply my blog and also has a slogan. In addition, my buddy Adeel Hussain has advised me to tone it down with the racial stuff….. Fuck that. I’m going up the ladder with this shit. It is fucking golden. I’ll give you a 10% pay cut for being brown that’s about it!  My "cousin" (when your brown, everyone is a cousin, uncle or auntie) has advised me I haven’t been bitching enough like my earlier posts.  Anyways off to ranting tonight.

Ignorance, ignorance, ignorance. It surrounds me like Jews around a penny. People ask me why I created this blog and I give them 2 answers: 1. To expose the ignorance of people we know. 2. Make fun of people who use their blog to express their "emotions" and "love", basically stuff I’d enjoy pissing on if they were physical items. No one cares about your emotions. But if you give the audience what they don’t get, they will love it. Recently, a friend of mine said "aren’t all Browns just Pakis?". No, he wasn’t from Texas so he wasn’t a hick unfortunately. I did acknowledge he was Mandarin one time, and when those Mandarin people talk I know it sounds like they are going to a fucking war with you. "SSHEESHA SHAA SHIU SHE XUESHEY SHEY". Then you got the Cantonese, for some odd reason have some grudge against them and they talk pretty hard too. But why ask such a question my friend? You live in a city where there is a significant South-Asian population (yes, many of you fucking losers think Pakistani/Indian/Bangaldeshi/Sri-Lankan are not asian or AZN). You aren’t new here homey. I let that one slide, because I knew him fairly well. I won’t grill him any further. Then you have the retards that are giving in to our precious media. I’m sure most do know the whole fucking world is heating on Islam due to problems in many Islamic countries. If you don’t know what Islam is, you shouldn’t really be allowed a computer or people for that matter. YOU ARE A FUCKING IGNORANT CUNT. The media makes Muslim people look worse than they actually are. I know plenty from all around and they are some of my good buddies I won’t fucking lie. Recently, my friend Ling (fucking annoying bitch by the way, seriously) notified me that some cracker told some Muslim girls to speak English and shoved them over. When I heard this one, and I’m not even Muslim but I got the sudden like Peter Griffin to do something random such as build a time-machine, go back in time, and go to where Ling was that day. Then grab this fucking cracker by the hair, put her in a room with everything she hates in this world and make her sit through it. This can be possibly (I’m assuming) rap music, Muslim people praying, immigrants walking over the border, basically anything some pregudice honkie would despise. Notice I say PREGUDICE, it’s not just any honkie. Because you honkies ultimately run this country …. for now hehe. Then I would make her sit down read the fucking Qu’Ran and then smash her in the face with another book (because I will not use the Qu’Ran in violence). Then jump on her and tell her "YOU JUST GOT KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT NIGGA!". If you have any other solutions to idiots like this woman, do tell me and I will post.

Another complaint I get very often is "why are you so angry on MSN?". If you had what I have to deal with simply just logging on to MSN (i.e. Frank Gauthier, Colin Anton, countless love names, moodiest fucking people, fobbed out names, poser names), you’d want to take your monitor and use it as an anchor to throw yourself off a balcony. I’ve expressed my anger before on this subject in an earlier post, unfortunately people do not learn. Instead of me typing, I will use images to get my point through. It’s about a week old when I made this, so you will probably see your old SN on it and a slightly outdated comment.  Check if you got fucking cussed up by me. Feel it is an honor I have handed your ass to you, and maybe you will correct your fucking MSN names (and thanks to fucking MSN 7, away messages also) or pass on the message to do it. I don’t block and delete you, because in person you’re usually normal. Some I just wanted to poke fun at because it was easy. Usually your SN’s are cool, you should know who you are. Anyways have fun with the pictures.

WOOPS ALMOST FORGOT, MSN IS BEING SLOWLY PHASED OUT. ITS NOW WLM (WINDOWS LIVE MESSENGER) 8.0 officially. http://messenger.msn.com to get it if you haven’t already. So it’s annoying Windows Live Messenger screen names from now on!

Top of my list (online only):

Bottom of my list (online only):

                                                       Fuckers!

Well this blog has been getting propped a lot recently.  On top of that, Tamils and the Chinks read it together.  For once, the worst of both smells have a common interest (besides bargaining).  In the future, I might move to myspace where there is more popularity… but depends.  I have made the Chinese suffer quite a bit on this blog, so I’m going to hit a little closer to home today.  Topic: TAMILS (Transalated: PANGARASAUNDALRAYRGAYNAN ILAY ILAY ANGARY!).

Ahh Tamils, Tamils, Tamils… what do we do in a Toronto without you?  Take back Parliament St. and Kennedy and Eglinton?  Let the Philipinos have their turf in St. Jamestown?  A couple of questions.  Don’t worry I don’t hate you guys… you are my brethren (somehow…).  I grew up with you kids, built club houses (which is pretty fucking white if I recall).  But you guys have it so good in this country; fuck I have a last name but if it was beyond your peoples average I’d feel pretty damn gangsta too!  You know how many Tamils are running scams in this country?  They are born brilliant; when the Revenue Canada calls for a "Sujakumarbalasksalmanjula Rajvijgaranumsivasuprmania" the guy on the phone will give up half-way.  In the caller’s head its like "fuck, why bother trying?  It’s one immigrant we can let go."  The Chinese know some scams as do Punjabis but it requires much labour.  You guys are born THIEVES!  Then if you don’t have name 10 letters (each name), your the fucking greatest thing since sliced bread.  My buddy named simply Colin Anton…. get ready for this…. IS TAMIL!  Fuck this nigga should be put in a Museum or something my good buddy Hammy said.  In addition, I quote Hammy:

"a tamil guy with a 5 letter name is as rare as an african without aids"

That’s pretty fucking amazing, so props to Colin.  He should be some type of cultural leader or pioneer.  On top of that, he doesn’t drive a ratty old Honda either.  I’ve noticed while chillin back in St. Jamestown, the tamil dudes upgraded from 89 Preludes to 96 Accords.  It’s like niggers and Acura Legends, its just fucking cool to drive that car!  You gotta have the ridiculous fade and plaid dress shirt to compliment the car to be hardcore man.  I also know your culture pretty well; marriage is of utmost importance just like the brown people from India.  For the guys with the 96 Accords,  I had to do a search for the finest you guys had to offer.  She cooks Kothra Roti damn good I’m sure and pretty comparable to those 23 year old girls in your movies that often dance with 40 year old guys for no apparent reason in the hills and mountains and cities (just like Hindi movies, without the fucked up age difference).  I went back to a favorite site of mine: http://www.bharatmatrimony.com (if you recall from an earlier post on Indian arranged marriages) and did a search on Tamils.  Take a look at these pics!

Here I am entering my criteria:

BAM!  Here is the top result and read it carefully….

Ahhh public transportation, for many of us it is necessary.  Hate it or love it, we have to take it.  I love informing my Asian friends of the real world, many of you asian kids that lack knowledge outside of bubble tea, jitz, movies, Moto V3 Razrs and bunning realized that the there was a TTC strike the other day! Like others, they could not hit their bf/gf’s house on Monday.  Sorry, I had to pick on you asian kids just so many on my list, it’s hillarious! Take a look…

Don’t worry I hate your people equally as mentioned before and respect your masterful driving skills :).  Some of you make a mistake by taking the TTC.  Hell, you guys should be working in the TTC more with us browns; if all TTC operators were Chinese, I’d be fucking happy (no sarcasm there by the way, seriously).  For once I’d get a "Hi", nod, "hmm" and nod again and be done with business with no questions asked.  Instead, I get a bunch fucking CRACKERS that think they are the kings of the T Dot because they sit behind a glass booth or drive a bigass bus.  50% of these workers are faggots and do not deserve to be represented by a collective bargaining agent (such as their union).  God needed jerks to balance the equation, he forged them and made them TTC workers.  Then there is the 10% that actually want to help you and are respectful…. so I don’t hate all of them.  Then the remaining 40% think they have power over you since the concept of post-secondary education has and always will be foreign to them.  Out of that population, 95% are wankers that cause the fare increases every fucking year.  Many of these workers are always disgruntled and deserve to be kicked and spat on (like how they complain).

Let’s go through some common scenarios…

TTC Operator: "Where is your Student card?"

Action taken: Pull it out and show them. (when I was a high-school student, fucking cunts don’t consider Uni students under student fare)

In my head: You can see I am at Bathurst Station at 3:30 PM with one of Toronto’s most largest and fucked up high-schools right by there (Central Tech).  In addition, I have a backpack on.  I’m really trying to cheat the system by dressing up as a student.  Idiot.

Me: "Are you stopping at this intersection? (Intersection)"

TTC Operator: "Well, look at what the bus says.  Can’t you read where I’m going?"

Me: "No, because it doesn’t tell me the stop clearly."

TTC Operator: "Well if I’m going down this road, you should know it intersects. So I’m going there."

Me: "Yeah so just tell me that first next time."

In my head: You are a fucking retard.  Are you trying to instigate something?  Do you feel proud you drive in circles, make 30-40K a year and I do not at the moment?  I salute you for knowing your bus routes faggot.

Here is an uncommon one while working at the shithole known as the CNE…

TTC Operator: "You can’t enter through here, you have to walk around."

The walk is about 4 mins around to the main gate, on top of that I have my uniform on and an ID card indicating I am an employee.  Therefore, I get a free ride on the TTC while returning.  You tell me, what problem is there If I take an open entrance that is easier for me.  I’m not cheating anyone nor is there any signs indicating I cannot.

Me: "Fuck you, I’ve worked all fucking day in the heat.  You can see I work here, are you stupid? What difference is it if I walk around?  It makes you happy?  idiot.  You guys need to clean up your act."

I did cuss him up somewhat like that, I remember saying fuck you quite a bit.  Its been a while.

So basically what I’m trying to say here, TTC operators are wankers for the most part.  They get a good fucking salary for sitting on their ass (on a stool or drivers seat!).  Cashiers stand all day and deal with different transactions and get loads of retards too.  Imagine Walmart!  They whine they aren’t treated properly?  I look at your face it looks like you haven’t shitted for 5 days, you told by your family you were an accident and you were doing society a favor by working in that booth.  To be honest, your personality seems like every rider is trying to cheat you and if you don’t speak English (Brown and Asian for example) you should get the fuck out of here.  So anytime a TTC worker is a cunt towards you, tell it to their face and piss on the money you give them.  No need to cheat them, give the workers what they deserve.

Mike Jones, dirty Bangaldeshi grocery stores and the invention of a new drink is what I will cover today.  It has been a while indeed… been busy with a number of things.  In addition, I am considering moving the blog over to MySpace this summer to join the band of countless fucking retards on the site.  It may gain more popularity.

Also guys please check out www.tdotvenues.com.  My boy Dex just started it up and I’m a part of the site.  Basically we want to get traffic going on the site at the moment.  You can come chat about all the clubs and events going on around Toronto, we have a gallery section that will be club specific soon.  So check that shiet out negras.  Definitely will have a lotta dimes on the site as well.

Well by now we all know who the fuck Mike Jones is; he is another fat nigger in the southern rap game who has successfully marketed himself by constantly repeating his name.  People that know me well, know I like my rap hard, gangsta, dirty, southern, crunked up, chopped/screwed and many other forms it comes in.  Just not in the form that Mike Jones delivers it in.  His beats sound like something ripped off of classic Sega games with them annoying synthesizers.  But don’t get me wrong, I will not question his flow and even some of his songs do make sense (such as "Back Then").  But c’mon, your first fucking album had tracks that repeated your name nearly 10+ times in one song.  On top of that, it was every song.  I let him off since he is just trying to get a name for himself and its his first album.  Now he has his own label called Ice Age and an upcoming album called "The American Dream".  Basically the tracks he has done up so far as collaborations to fill in time before his next album has started fucking constantly yelling ICE AGE.  For example, the Draped Up remix he has a good flow but its just about Ice Age for about half the section he does.  I’m pretty sure the next album will see more yelling about Ice Age and the public will swallow it (like Tera Patrick and a warm cumshot), which will help it rise to platinum status.  Basically this nigger will be the first one in the rap books that rose to fame by repeating names instead of only (notice I said only because he touches on the typical themes often) rapping about cars, beatin the shit out of other niggers on the block and how hoes are on them all the time. This is how society has gone down the drain.

Now speaking about down the drain, I travelled down this drain of society and arrived around the corner.  To my surprise, I found a Bangaldeshi grocery store there.  I am Bengali, not Bangladeshi and but have loads of Bangladeshi friends I give mad respect to.  But, the people in this store were not my friends indeed.  Instead when I entered, they looked like this store was funding the next 9/11 to occur.  Scary at many degrees.  I was in here with my mother to buy Fish, and as my boy Roach says it "Bengalis are the fish niggers of brown people".  It’s quite true, we’re almost as bad as the Portugease (with fish that is, please don’t compare us with anything else).  In the back of the store, where they had their "fresh" poultry my mom dragged me along to basically create a vomit-inducing experience.  For the first time, I went to a grocery store where they sold (I quote them) "Yellow Chicken" and the legs were stacked in a disgusting fashion.  I saw huge slabs of beef that looked so nasty, it made me feel they slaughtered them in the back of the store.  The Bangaldeshi peeps were cutting the fish with amazingly skilled and the one Arab guy was even better than them.  Why? Because he had no gloves, his hands were covered in blood and took orders down with his bare hands as well.  He took down my mom’s order with a pen, bare hands and on a notepad.  He had difficulty flipping the notepad, so he licked his BARE FUCKING THUMB to get his grip.  I really felt like I should of called the Health Department and Immigration and RCMP all at once on this store.  Chinks have some of the dirtiest stores (you guys know it), but in my opinion these people topped them all.  But this lead me to another amazing discovery in this store: they sold the Indian soda called Limca!  Greatest fucking drink ever!  This now leads me to another story.

Last Saturday, Daniel Gerard was a sheer genius along with me.  I saved him a bottle of Limca I had purchased from shit-hole store.  You cannot buy Limca anywhere but India, but if you lucky you might find it imported.  It is a drink made by Coca-Cola that has more fizz than Sprite/7UP, more ginger and even a bit of a taste of lychee.  It fucking owns.  Basically him and our boy Hammy were getting plasted off a bunch of stuff including a mickey of Bacardi Gold.  He was tipsy and mixed my Limca with his Bacardi and it was a match made in heaven.  So I give you the recipe for this drink:

3 Shots Bacardi Gold or any similar rum

Half bottle of Limca

Serve over rocks

Sheer Genius!

Update: I did not invent this drink, supposedly my dirty Punjab buddy Vab says it has already been done in India.  So from this point, I declare my drink to be invented for the first time in Canada.

Well I’m sure you peeps saw one of my earlier drunken posts about 3 weeks ago, I won an iPod Nano (2 GB).  So I have officially entered the fad of iPods.  It’s worth about 249 bucks… so it was a significant win for me.  Possibly not as significant as winning a girl over or a political race, but pretty significant knowing my luck.  It’s pretty much the first and last thing I’ll ever win in my life, excluding the prize of being brown so I should be proud.  I’m too fucking lazy to take pictures of the thing, everyone knows how they look like and I’m sick of using them after selling so many at work.  Let us begin…

I unwrapped the plastic seal around the box, then the tape around the side.  It was quite erotic opening it, like a condom mmmm.  Inside I was graced by white useless packaging which was quite efficient, something like plastic you would pack Lays chips in.  Inside had my overpriced USB cable, usesless software, the cheapest earbuds that enjoy popping on you within weeks and the consumer demanded carrying case.  Why did they demand one? Here is why…. popped out my Nano from the box and BAM scratches on it from my fingers!  It’s quite fashionable when a fucking paper thin MP3 player has eyesores on it from Day 1.  Charged it up, sent my songs over with iTunes which is probably the wierdest media player I’ve used.  The battery was at 3/4 in 15 mins from what I saw due to the constant use of the backlight by me, in a few months knowing these pieces of crap I’ll prolly see them at 1/4 or less all the time.  Only good thing I can say about is that the interface feels like Mac’s godly OSX (Apple’s Operating System, Duh!), so I feel like the White and Philipino people that buy them machines.  White people buy them because they are white like them and very expensive, Philipinos people buy them to look like white people and support their native California where they are designed (there are fucking SHITLOADS of them there, the flips that is).

All in all, I’ve used iPods many times but never my own.  Not at all impressed still, the interface is nice and simple, even the stupidest Paki could operate it (we actually already do know, look at me).  I ended spending 40 bucks on a piece of for a piece of rubber to cover it today, easily could of been 4 condoms layered and cut to fit it in my opinion.  I can’t wait for a huge lawsuit to occur so they stop using them as such a fucking fashion statement and realize like me they are pieces of crap.

Oh one other thing, Distrikt is the most fobbed out club I have ever been to and prolly a big shithole.  Yes Kim, your home away from home is a PIECE OF SHIT.  End of post…

There are many intelligent people in this world, one of them happen to be Reginald.  He is a cartoon lizard or dinosaur, but whatever he is many things he says is true.  I support muslim people to the fullest, but some of the things said in this video are so fucking true (comparing Jesus and Mohammed and the mistakes that are made).  I am pretty fucking racist most of the time, so no offense to muslims with this video.

http://www.zipperfish.com/myspace/toons/yaafm12.swf

The others on the site I agree on fully.

I have nothing to comment on right now, my beard is fucking itchy.  I got drunk after the autoshow as you can see posted earlier.  Danny G was looking good that day, and he’s gonna get his bitch back.  I know he will!

The world has gone to hell: Three 6 Mafia has won an oscar.  A win for the crips!

Oh and Street Fighter is the most racist game http://www.itsakittybug.com/Suckball/jamesarticles/StreetFighter.html